A Puzzle

Sometimes when I check on my sleeping boys

before I go to bed, I linger a while ~ praying

and crying over them. Autism is such

a challenging thing. Whoever chose a puzzle

piece to represent the disorder was exactly

right. And yet finding a cure for your

child is like a 10,000 piece puzzle

all of the same color, with a few thousand

fake pieces thrown in just for frustration.

I'm overwhelmed when I think that each of

my three boys has a different puzzle.

And yet, how frustrating to them to be

trapped in their world. So much potential

that can't break through. The responsibility

of finding treatments and help for them is

enormous. Extended family is local

and yet distant at the same time. And yet

I can't force anyone to be involved in their

lives. I think autism has completely

changed the way I look at life. There

is no room for pettiness. There is no

room for grudges. There is no room for

unkindness. There are more important

things to tend to. God, give me the

wisdom and strength for today ~ for

my triplets, for my other son and

husband. Let your love shine

through me in all that I do.

Guide and direct our family and

provide our needs.

Amen.