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Friday, December 30, 2016

The Week In Between


Enjoying the tree two more nights.

Disclaimer....this is a long post.
You might want to take a bathroom break, grab a snack
and come back. haha.  It's really a post for myself,
but you're welcome to read and comment..or not. :)

This might be my most favorite week of the year....
between Christmas and New Year's Day.  There are no plans,
no day program, no work, no leaving the house.
No alarms, packing lunches, no obligations.
The Mister (mr. workaholic) doesn't go into work...just
about the only week of the year he will do this!
We lounge, play with Christmas toys, watch movies,
and eat.....and eat...and eat.  
But my most favorite thing to do is to curl up alone with
a bunch of blank papers, a new empty calendar,
a glass of wine, and I think....reflect...contemplate...
plan, dream, critique, wish and consider goals, resolutions,
 and all of those crazy things people who love lists do!
It's a sickness, I tell you....haha....but I love it.

I've been quiet here on the blog more weeks than usual this year.
There were years on end that I didn't miss a single day!
And even though I've been quiet, it doesn't mean I don't have a
lot to say!  Gosh, there has been a lot of changes in my life in the
last few years...most things I don't ever write about.
And during 2016, I did quite a bit of taking care of myself
physically and emotionally...more than ever before.
So when I think of what to talk about here on my blog in the
coming year, there are so many topics I want to cover that it's
hard to know where to start!  I want to tell you about my New Year's 
 Resolution!  And how I lost 15 pounds without any exercise!  Yes, it's
 true..just a few tweaks to what I ate.  I couldn't believe it, myself!
And mostly about taking care of myself emotionally.

I've toyed with what to share here for several years.  I think
some people share way to much personal info.  I don't want to
air the family's dirty laundry. I'd never give TMI about my 
 immediate family members here under my roof.  But what about
other things?  I've deflected questions over the years about
the my parents, the fact that I'm a middle sister but my siblings are
obviously not a part of my life or what kind of effect that has
had on me.  I've mentioned a few times to closer blog friends the
possibility of writing about those things and have been met every
time with great doubt in the wisdom of doing so.  Yet the nagging
feeling continues that it would be good therapy for me.
Could it be that it would be healthy to get it out in the open?
I know I'm not alone in some of these struggles and hurts and I'm
seriously considering starting a Therapy Thursday series just to
say some things out loud.  Not weekly, but maybe monthly.
I think it might go a long way in doing myself some good and
might actually be a relief to not pretend that everything is
wonderful, like I do in my silence.   So, I'll think about this
a few more days and see.  Maybe I'll flip a coin to decide. haha.

2016 sure had it's big changes here!  I quit my auction job back 
in January!  Taylor and Lauren moved to Pennsylvania and just
today closed on their first house!  I turned a storage room into
a guest room.  I finally went to the doctor for my migraines and
got on a prescription that has changed 48 hour torture sessions
into painless days. (well, headache-wise, that is!).   We lost
two parakeets, just one week apart from each other.  And I
got to fly out to Utah to spend some time with my niece, which
was probably my favorite thing of the year!  Like every year,
it was full of happy and sad times, but with God's help we have
survived,........ maybe even thrived!




60 comments:

  1. Precious Betsy,
    Life is really full of bumps and hurts for each one of us.
    I really like the idea of a Therapy Thursday. Sometimes getting things out in the daylight helps without airing dirty linen...
    Sometimes I really don't know how you hold it all together. Without God's help I know you couldn't.
    Enjoy your Time In between !
    That alone is great therapy.
    I'm finding that my turning 73 and my Hubby turning 75 January 1st is truly a wake-up call. Life is precious and I want us to make the most out of each day that the Good Lord gives us.
    Love you dear Blog Friend.
    Sue

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    1. Oh, thank you for the encouragement! I needed to hear that. Yes, I think I can talk about how things have effected me and be tactful at the same time. None of these people are in blog land. Some aren't even living any longer. I do agree that the older you get the more you consider a lot of things! 73 and 75...wow...how wonderful! Every birthday is a gift...that's how I've always looked at it!

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  2. I read the post from start to finish:) And it was an interesting read and yes we all have issues with one thing or another. I have reflected on 2016 as well. So many changes but alas not the loss of 15 pounds. ;) Good on you Betsy! Than you for sharing, a great post.
    Wish you God's best blessings in 2017

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    1. Thanks, Betty! Yes, we all have our concerns and hard things to deal with! I'll share about those 15 pounds soon. :) Hugs and prayers for a happy 2017!

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  3. I get this as best as another person can understand some one else's life. I struggle with what to share too....yes, some people share way too much. I've unfollowed many on Facebook. Still I come here....your posts are filled with joy, pets, family, work, faith. All in a wonderful way. Let's boldly move into 2017. God said He will never leave us......I believe that. Happy New Year to you and your family.

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    1. Oh, FB is an entirely different story. haha. I rarely go there and each time I'm usually sorry I did. I must be extra sensitive. lol.... the election stuff got me the most...some things so hurtful that I know people wouldn't say to my face but some how people don't think online blanket statements are read by real people who actually care. Anyway....yes, I know you've struggled with how much to share. I don't seem to struggle with what I'm dealing with physically. It's the emotional stuff caused by others. But I've given this a lot of thought and how it's entangled with Christianity or the misconception of some about what Christianity really is. It should be an interesting series if I dare to jump into it. :) Boldly...yes, I like that. I think I'm ready to be bold.

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  4. I honestly wouldn't recommend airing family grievances on your blog, if you do you might get some negative responses. As you know I did just that on FB and my blog and some of the comments were not as sympathetic as I had hoped, quite the reverse in fact. They upset me and I deleted them as quickly as I could. My New Years resolution is to post about me, my interests and Dinky of course. I will keep my thoughts about family to myself, and try to blog about cheerful things from now on. Politics, yes. Scroungers and false friends, no.

    Betsy, I consider you and others who comment on your blog, although only cyber friends, as true friends.

    Have a Good and Prosperous 2017.

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    1. Yes, I hear you...and I understand what you're saying. I'm not one to delete comments, though. If someone wants to say something mean, I leave it there for all to see. I know you like the cheerful things...and I usually am...but this is about my emotional well being. I've been considering this for years and I think it's time...time to deal with it.

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  5. Think a lot of you and want nothing more than to see you happy. Whatever you think will best help you, you know I am a good listener and will help in any way and support you to my very best ability. I think you are wonderful the way you cope with things and I have nothing but admiration for you. Wishing you a Happy New Year. . . 😊

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  6. Betsy, the thing about sharing a little about your life is you will find that we all have those crazy struggles. It's a little bit therapeutic to share and to hear from others. I've only shared bits and pieces of real life but I've always felt that people are kind are receptive. :)

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    1. Yes, I know you're right. 99% of bloggers are wonderful. :) I've had a few meanies...haha...but they are by far the minority and don't stick around...or I don't stick around. We all have struggles and can relate and encourage each other...very true!

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  7. You have been busy! =)

    I think a Therapy Thursday series sounds great! I have a son who has Autism also, and I can relate to your struggles. Maybe...a "private" blog/group could be started for everyone who is interested in the Therapy Thursday series?

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    1. Thanks, Melissa. :) Strangely enough, my struggles aren't about autism...at least not directly. Dealing with autism might deplete my emotional tank at times but it isn't at the forefront of the issues I'm talking about here. However, if you want to start one, I'd love to pop in once in a while. I have found, though, that being public about it is good for those who don't know much about autism...because the families that don't deal with it personally need to be educated, too! Thanks for the thoughts...

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    2. I understand Betsy. I have been dealing with some issues recently..that are unrelated to autism. ( and it seems sometimes that it can be overwhelming to deal with it all )

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    3. I totally get that! Start the private blog....seriously!

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  8. Betsy, I admire you so much. I understand a bit of what your life is like with the boys. Our Baylor had pneumonia this week and my daughter in law, has been to the doctor with him every day for shots to keep him out of the hospital. This was going on while I was out of town and unable to help out so i have a lot of guilt about that. I know we all struggle but those family hurts are the hardest. Maybe you need to just get a journal and write down your thoughts and goals. I find that helps me to think clearly. I am so glad you got help for migraines. My son and husband suffer with them so I understand that as well. When I hear people say, I have a migraine and they are able to stand up and say that, in my head, I go...Uh no you don't you have a headache.:) Thanks for sharing your thoughts with us. I often share your posts with my son and daughter in law to encourage them.

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    1. Thanks Arlene. A journal might be a good choice....I'll consider that. Although, I talk to my self all the time....sometimes out loud. :)
      I hope your migraine sufferers have tried Imitrex...life changing, I tell you! I've never had it fail me.

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  9. I read the whole post, too :-) And I would love to read some of your 'background'-which I've wondered and speculated about for years. Maybe you could start with a Therapy Thursday (singular, like a one-time nonoccurence) and see where it takes you.

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    1. yes, a one time post might be good for a first try. The problem is where to start! haha. Maybe just where I am now for context and then jump back into the past. :)

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  10. I've always enjoyed your blog posts Betsy, your positive attitude and love of family speaks volumes.
    I probably would advise against using your blog to air any personal grievances, once written in print they can never be unsaid. Maybe a personal, private blog or journal may work.
    I'm looking forward to many more visits back and forth in 2017, thank you for sharing your beautiful world.
    Wishing you and yours a Happy and Healthy New Year.
    Hugs
    Jo

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    1. Well, I respect your opinion, Jo. Thank you. I was hoping to share in a way that it wouldn't be personal grievances, but I'll certainly take your suggestions to heart. :)

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  11. Betsy, I've sensed off and on for some time now that you have been holding a lot of things inside of you, which I don't think is healthy. Seeing a therapist could be one option; I think some are still afraid of the stigma of seeing a therapist, but taking care of your mental health is nothing to be ashamed of. Letting things out through your blog is certainly another option, and perhaps the situation is that you have nothing to lose (in terms of those relationships) by going this route. It's really hard for anyone else to really say. But I do think you need to let things out. Life is not always happy and nice, and outwardly pretending does not make it so. Best to you, Betsy.

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    1. Oh, I have nothing against therapists, but...do they really help? I have two friends who see therapists and I have asked several times what they get out of it, if there is helpful advice, etc. Both seem to think that really they are just listeners. No goals set, no suggestions, etc. That really bothers me. I would want more than someone who merely listens.

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  12. I didn't share much personal until I grew to have some blogging 'friends', and then our son dies. It's been good for me to share more since. We'll be sympathetic , non-judgemental listeners!

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    1. Yes, blog friends are the best, aren't they? Thanks, Furry. :) So sorry about your son. Glad you've found some comfort in sharing!

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  13. I've always felt that "your well runs deep." I am such a fan. But I guess you know that by now. ❤

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    1. Aw, thanks Janice! I guess it runs deep...and I've been finding ways to make sure it doesn't run dry. haha. This year has been good for that in a few ways, so I think I'm in a much better place than a year ago. You are always sweet and encouraging...love that about you!

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    2. Keep doing what you do. You're inspiring. Happy 2017 to you. 🎉

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  14. I read it all - without a break! :)
    We all have to choose what we blog about and what we keep quiet about. None of us have a perfect life, and we've gone through some issues with some siblings this year as well, that ended up being pretty difficult in the last month. I have a feeling that most of your readers would totally understand - but we will also understand the things you need to keep quiet on. Just be sure you talk about it to someone - it's not good to keep it all in. I think that if you did a Therapy Thursday you would be surprised to find how many of us are in similar situations. Happy new year to all the Brocks!

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    1. Thanks, Mari! Sorry you've had to deal with some difficult stuff this year, too. It's hard! Not sure what I'll do yet. I know I'm not alone, that is for sure. :)

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  15. Betsy, I look so forward to Therapy Thursdays if you choose to do that. I must agree with my dear and close friend Sue and all she said. Amen to it. She is a very encouraging woman.

    I'm not sure how long I have known you Betsy, but you have been one of my favorite people, and I so respect you life and how you live it. I pray that you will have perfect peace to share you stories, and I know many of us will relate, and be helped by your wisdom and words. Love you, dear.

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    1. Well, I knew if I put the idea out here that my friends would tell me honestly what they think. Looks like it's a tie as to yeses and nos. haha. And maybe it's enough just to have this post to say it isn't all wonderful..there are gaps and people missing and sometimes you have to just accept that. And you know, I do have peace about it...maybe that's why I felt I could share/talk about it now. But not sharing is alright, too. :)

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  16. I too struggle with what to share. Often I will TMI about my health issues but only because I think it might help someone else who has those same struggles, but never do I share the truth about my health and all it's complications. I also have a sister who choses to not be part of my life and sometimes start to write about it and then think better of it. I don't know....I think we can only do what feels right to us. I think a therapy Thursday would be wonderful. Happy New Year you.

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    1. Thanks, Jo. I'm glad you've shared some of your health struggles and hope that your online friends have encouraged you, especially in this last year!

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  17. While I would never presume to walk in another's shoes (or bright red Wellies!) I know a bit about your family and history.
    I also know that you have been coming to this point for a while so maybe this is the year.
    Maybe a journal is an idea but it's not airing it in quite the same way. But it might help you decide if you want to continue it in blog form.
    Or you could post once and see how you feel about it after.
    I thought long and hard about posting about my recent surgery and decided to brave it out. I have no regrets. I received enormous support and encouragement which has been truly helpful in my healing. And I also heard from people about their own related struggles. Sharing was very therapeutic on both sides.
    But everyone is different and you are smart, strong and brave and your gut and your heart will guide you.
    I think you also have to ask yourself why you wish to share the information. That way you will sort out, in advance, how you will feel if you get negative feedback. I say to heck with those who are not supportive. That's their problem, not yours. The majority will be encouraging and will share their own struggles with you... maybe for the first time. And that's therapeutic for you, for those commenting and for those following silently.
    Up to you, my friend. You will know if, and when, the time is right.
    Love to you. xox
    (You probably needed a snack during my long comment!)

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    1. Not a snack...but I had breakfast! hahaha....
      Yes, you make some good points here. Maybe a book. :) What would the title be...hmmm...."You Can't Make This Stuff Up" subtitle...Memoirs of One Girl's Crazy Life...How Much Lemonade Can One Girl Make...lol...oh, the possibilities!
      I think I have my answer, though. If half of my readers advise against it, I'm not going to do it. I thought it would be healing for me and that was the only reason...not vindictive, not airing grievances....those people don't read my blog anyway. I'll find another outlet. In a way, just saying the bit that I did helped and maybe that's all that was needed.

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    2. Betsy, just in your reply to Suzanne, you show so much wisdom. You will ultimately do just the right thing. So enlightening to read all the comments and replies. Hugs

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    3. Ha! Your book titles made me laugh. And they are true! Whether you share that particular topic or not I love visiting your blog. No matter the topic I feel it's always a pick-me-up.

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  18. Hi Betsy - reading your post and some of the comments - I think you've got the right idea ... so I'd go ahead with it ... I learn from other bloggers so much - I struggle too ... but won't go that route - as I cope without opening up and really don't need to ... but I know that sometimes I help others in blog land and in real life with my comments - which have probably come from the learning I glean. I can't get myself dragged down into other challenges though ...

    I think it'll be hugely helpful to many - good luck with your decision ... I'll be here with you - supporting as I can ... cheers and have a very happy New Year and for us both a better 2017 ... a change up ... take care - Hilary

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    1. I do agree that we can help each other....that's the best part about this blogging!

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    2. So true ... we do learn and we do take steps back and look at ourselves, and we do help each other at times ... with many thoughts - H

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  19. haha while I was reading Cassie went and took a pee
    I guess she wanted to take the advice of thee
    Look at you go on this final date
    What you eat can sure get rid of weight
    As for TMI bah says the cat at our sea
    But then he goes crazy as can be
    Can get away with it as no one really believes you
    Or think you just have a loose screw
    Could add nicknames and such
    May work in the clutch
    2016 has been a meh year here
    But had far worse for my rhyming rear
    So that right there is a perk
    We'll see if 2017 is grand or a jerk.

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    1. I guess Cassie has a smaller bladder than thee.
      Or maybe she thought it a boring read. haha.
      You are the authority on what food can do
      so I will leave writing that health book up to you!
      But I do agree
      food can be crazy!
      I've often thought I had a screw loose
      or maybe I just need a pet goose.
      The zoo isn't as crowded as it once was
      and I miss that, just because! lol.

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  20. This has been my saddest year ever and I have mentioned a time or two about my mom, but not everything. I struggle with the notion of telling too much, or not telling enough and just confusing everyone. I know it helps me to write things down, so I am journaling again, after a long dry spell. I wish a happy NEW YEAR to you and your boys, and I'll be popping by here or seeing you on instagram!

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    1. The struggle is real, isn't it? Being transparent can be very healing, I think....and I think that's why this idea won't leave my head. This blog group can be very supportive and you find there are many others in the same boat. I hope 2017 is a better year for you. And yes, I do enjoy seeing you on IG! In fact, I enjoy IG more than the blog these days. Who would have thought!

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  21. I think you should just go with your gut. Share things if and when you feel you need to, but not necessarily on any regular schedule.

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    1. Thanks, David. :) So you think a Spontaneous Saturday would be better? lol....

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  22. Dear Betsy, I am so happy I did pop in here just before taking off tomorrow morning. Call it a break between packing, making list, taking things out of list ... I do NOT like packing or unpacking ... lol. I am happy your migranes are under control! Did you ever see a chiropractor for your migranes? They say it is sometimes related to twiched nerves around the spine ... beware though one needs a good trusted chiropractor and it tends to get worse before it gets better ... anyway. As for your 'therapy Thursdays' ... I belive that emotional health is very important and we all tend to neglect it to some extend ... and that is not healthy. So if you feel it right to 'talk' some things out on the blog why not to give it a try? If you feel it is turning there where you do not want it to go then you don't need to continue. Nothing will really happen anyway. As you said most of the bloggers will be supportive. So my guess is that most of them will show you compassion and support, some may have some insight into it even, and then everyone will go on with their life anyway ... so it is not like it is going to be hold against you or anything like that. My friend has marital issues and she sees a psy after psy yet no one seems to really help her anyway. I think most of the time not to keep things inside us can help us to see thing from another perspective and it can be often enough to start the healing process (it can be sharing it publicly or privately to a trusted friend). To sum it up (haha) I would trust your guts on this! :-)
    Well, I better get back to packing. I am so happy I found you years back here in the blog land!! You are a wonderful human being!! Happy happy New Year to you and to your dear ones!! Will be back mid January :-) hugs, Jitka

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    1. Thank you, Jitka! I don't like the packing/unpacking, either! But unpacking is definitely worse! lol...
      I thought about a chiropractor but I've heard so many horror stories of things gone bad that I didn't go that route. I will say that my chronic neck problems are SO much better. I bought a ProWave massager (saw the ad on IG) and it has done wonders to loosen up that side of my neck and shoulder. Some days I don't even think about it now, which is amazing when you think that for over a year I couldn't look to the right...my neck just wouldn't move that way! I know it was stress and tension. Crazy! All that so say, I'm so much healthier now and want to keep working on some things. So nice!
      Have a wonderful trip! I know you're looking forward to it! Give Steve and Montik a hug for me. :)

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  23. We both share a few struggles in that category,eh Betsy?
    You will do what is right for you...and your Men...you are a pretty smart cookie💚
    All the best to you...and a very happy 2017...
    Cheers!
    Linda :o)

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  24. Great blog post. Happy New Year to you and your family. I enjoy your blog very much. I can't remember how I found it but I'm glad I did.

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    1. Well, I'm glad you did, too! Thank you so much for reading!

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  25. So glad that this Christmas the boys "seemed to be more in tuned" with it. How wonderful for you!
    My thoughts on sharing are 50/50 also!! How's that for an opinion? I know that I pray for things, not knowing the whole story, sometimes it might be nice to know more. I read Blogs that I like and find helpful, beautiful: if I don't like what the author has to say, I just stop reading them, but others seem to care for them; we all have a choice of who we want to read.
    Blessings on a New Year for the family. We love and miss so many people!

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  26. I'm not sure if my vote counts since I'm so rarely in blog world except as a silent lurker. :) However, I'll give my opinion. I think Therapy Thursday sounds like an excellent idea. Sometimes just putting things down in words brings healing. Happy New Year!!

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  27. That was not a long blog at all---I really enjoyed reading it---I like your writing style --you are a great writer. A therapy sessions sounds great---I think lots of people pretend in silence and its good to know that we aren't alone. Have a great 2017. I look forward to reading more of your writings this year.

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