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Saturday, July 27, 2013

The Anxious Parts


This post is to dispel any misconception that we could throw 3 autistic
teenage boys in the jeep, drive 8 hours away and stay in a hotel
for 5 days without there being some anxious moments. :)


Yes, for the most part they were great, but there were a few times
when I thought they acted like they had been through enough.
Alex was the most anxious, and I was really surprised when he
refused to have a bowel movement the entire time we were gone.
I guess he just didn't feel comfortable away from home!
Sorry, but just keeping it real, especially for my parents-of
autistic-kids here. :)  And after we had been
traveling home on Tuesday for about 6 hours
he cried big crocodile tears for a good 30 minutes.
Poor buddy.  I think he had been stretched and pushed over his
limit far enough.  He was happy and 'relieved' when we
got home and all was well again! ha.


But for the most part, they really did very well!
And they really loved the dance floor at the wedding reception!
The music was loud, but they all wore their sound-reducing headsets
and did just fine....except for those moments I captured in the
first collage above. lol....
I loved how everyone danced with them.  So fun!

We also took them out of their comfort zone and ate at
Red Robin one evening.  That's another loud place! ha.
I peeled the corn bread off of a corn dog and Spencer
ate that with mandarin oranges off the kids menu.
Harry ate fries.  And Alex, was thrilled with an onion
ring tower and chicken fingers. I'm glad we tried it.  Sometimes it's 
just easier to do what you know they are comfortable with.
But it's also good to push them a little and try something new.


67 comments:

  1. I feel anxious when I am on a trip too. And in loud places. But I think they did really well and I am so proud of them. I'm the opposite of Alex. I can't get off the toilet when I am about to go somewhere or leave that destination. Just keepin' it real here! :)

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    1. Yes, they really did quite well! And they really deserved the day of trains at the end for a reward!
      And you're allowed to keep it real....I think that's a common problem when you're eating out every meal for days. lol...

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    2. And just so you know, that's Harry dancing with Lauren. :)

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  2. I was wondering if it was Harry. ♥

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  3. I'm so glad it tuned out well, it must have been a challenge, the boys look so happy dancing, I know how upsetting the schedule for our Gracie Jean is and she is only 3 and half! We brought her a mini trampoline the other day and already her Mum (our Lyndsy) is seeing a difference in her, she loves to bounce, we knew this and the trampoline allows that, she starts her Autistic doctor is wonderful , full of ideas,

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    Replies
    1. What a great idea for her! I'm glad they are liking the doctor, too!

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  4. Oh the reality of your life. I'm so glad you let us be a part of it. I'm a better person because of what you share. My grand daughter who is an Assistant Manager of Red Robin would be proud of your boys, and there was something on the menu for all of them. BTW you look adorable in that dress!

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    Replies
    1. our waitress was just the best....she made it easy to be there. :)

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  5. Thanks for all the pictures. Loved seeing Lauren and you in the beautiful dresses. Did the boys have any role in the ceremony?

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    1. No, they didn't. Taylor considered having them in tuxes and standing with him, but we thought that might be too much.

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  6. First things first ~~~ I love your mother of the groom dress. It is beautiful and suits you to a T. Next I love the boys in all white ... and of course, all of the photos are spectacular. I know you are happy to be back on familiar ground.

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    1. Thanks, Helen. I loved my dress, too! Yes, we're glad to be back home and getting back into the regular routine. They boys have gone back to day camp and have fully recovered. lol....

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  7. these are really cute and lovely pictures and love yours dancing with Taylor! and the kids are lovely!!

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  8. I love the pictures of the dancing and also the one of you and Taylor! You look great and the dress is perfect!

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    Replies
    1. Fortunately, one of my friends picked up my camera and took that picture. I'm so glad he did!

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    2. Thanks, Rhonda! :) I liked it, too!

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  9. You are brave parents. My brother had a hard time even coming home to my parent's house for a few hours. They gave up on him ever staying the weekend while he was still in his teens. He would take them to the car and ask to go "home", back to the terrible state institution he was so familiar with.

    I love your "real" pictures. Thank you for sharing your precious boys with us.

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    1. Aw, that just breaks my heart. I can't imagine how your parents felt. It just goes to show you how important routine and familiar surroundings are to them...it's a comfort, no matter how institutional.

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    2. Back in those days there weren't many options. Deep inside my mother is still brokenhearted over how his life turned out, but he has taught us so many things. I know she hurts, and I can't blame her, I would be heartbroken too, and yet it is hard to imagine having learned all those life lessons without him.

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    3. yeah, that is so true! And you can see why I want them to live here at home forever..where I can care for them and they are so happy. I can't imagine worrying about them if they were in someone else's care. Nobody can read them like me.

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  10. i am glad they did well...ouch on that bowel movement but glad he settled back in...i am sure it was tough on them but it was good for them too as well i imagine....

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    1. I think it was good...there's so much world to see and experience! Each new thing is good in it's own way!

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  11. You look just beautiful and it is amazing that you were able to anticipate the triplets needs and enjoy your son's wedding. Not easy to do and you have a way of taking it all in stride.

    Much love,

    XO,
    Jane

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    Replies
    1. Thanks, Jane! I took a long time thinking through the time away and what they would need. We brought a lot of familiar things with us...food, even their favorite plates they eat off of. And their laptops and DVD's. And we gave them time to chill out in the hotel room, too. I wouldn't want to do it every month, but I was encouraged enough to do it again some time!

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  12. I figured there had to be at least a few anxious moments, but it sounds like the boys did incredibly well overall. So glad they had fun times dancing at the reception... reminds me of my son at a recent wedding we went to.

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    1. I thought of Kai at that wedding reception! Yes, the dancing is the best part...everyone is relaxed and the stuffy parts are over! :) They really did exceptionally well...and even I was stretched, which is a good thing. I'm more apt to play it safe...especially when out in public. ha.

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  13. Your boys are really cute and seems they even enjoyed the dance..it was so sweet on the part of Taylor and Lauren to give company to the brothers..your pic with Taylor is the picture perfect and the dress is just wowwwww!!!!!!

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    1. That was one of my favorite parts...seeing everyone dance with them. And they loved it!

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  14. I'm sure YOU had some anxious moments over the weekend too! So glad you all got home OK. The pictures area great and you looks so lovely!

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    1. Thanks, Mare....it was a very good time, especially considering the challenges of our family!

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  15. Wonderful photos! I am not surprised that there were a few anxious moments...that goes with the territory. But what a marvelous success!

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    1. It really does go with the territory...but we're sure pleased with the results!

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  16. They are very brave young men. It can be stressful for all of us to be in new situations and places.
    Love the dancing!

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    1. the dancing was the best...and I wish I'd taken photos of the young college-age dancers...wow, could they do the moves...so fun to watch! Us oldies got off the floor and just watched! ha.

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  17. You are amazing even with the keeping it real parts. I am such a homebody and can relate to the anxiousness. The photos are wonderful!

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    1. I'm a homebody, too! Glad to be home! ha.

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  18. I think traveling that long would be hard on all children and even most adults. As far as I can tell they did a great job. I think it is wonderful that you took them on such a long drive and for almost a week being away from home. And it seems as if the boys were pretty awesome for the majority of the time for you and the Mister. I think you have to just start doing more day trips so they will get used to it. I just have a feeling they are going to want to do that beautiful train day more than just this once. And maybe once they get used to shorter trips then this longer trip will be easier.

    I think you look so beautiful in that dress, It just goes with your coloring and made you look elegant. I also thought Lauren's dress was gorgeous, I especially liked the back of it. Taylor and Lauren looked so relaxed dancing with the boys. You are all special people and were surrounded with special and giving people. I feel like a proud mama chick being so proud of all of you.

    God bless.

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    1. Aw, thanks, Sherry....you're so sweet!

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  19. You navigated the anxious parts with true Betsy style. Kudos to you and your family. blessings ~ tanna

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    1. Thanks, Tanna~! We did it! And survived, too!

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  20. No bowel movement for that long
    My his holding skills are strong
    But germy loos abound
    So i agree to wait for home ground
    Sure they were relived to be home
    But as you say always good to try something new once in a blue moon as out you roam

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    1. haha...I knew you could relate
      as germy toilets would not be your fate!

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  21. I wondered about this aspect, too. Glad the problems were so few. Poor guys. Five days are enough to wear anyone out!

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    1. I think they enjoyed themselves for the most part...there were just those few moments that showed us that they were being pushed a little out of their comfort zones.

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  22. That's a story worth hearing. Amazing what the mind can do. Five days! I was surprised when I learned our younger son would hold his bladder & bowels all day in elementary school. He said the restrooms were dirty and he wouldn't use them. This went on for a number of years.

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    1. I knew a few kids...of my parent friends...that do this, too! I think it's more common than we know.

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  23. I agree with you Betsy, it most certainly was a good idea to let them do all this new stuff over the wedding period, really glad that for the most part they had a great time, you do amazing with them.

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    1. Yeah, it was good. I don't usually like to get out of my comfort zone either, so I think we all needed a push!

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  24. I'm catching up after a week away. These photos are so very special...both sets. I don't always like big groups of people myself, so I can relate a bit to that! Love the bottom collage! I'm going to go back thru your posts to see your dress! Glad your weekend was wonderful!

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    1. I'm glad you're back! I missed you! How'd you do with all that cooking??? ha.

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  25. He'd kill me for saying this, but my "man" doesn't like having a bm away from home either. TMI, I know.

    I don't know how you do it, Betsy!

    I'm with your guys though, I'm not that great on road trips either; I miss my bed too much!

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    1. I won't tell his secret. lol....

      It was wonderful to be back in my own bed, yes!

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  26. HI Betsy .. I'm working backwards too - I didn't expect you'd gotten away completely scot-free .. but so pleased that in general all was well - and the Red Hen was reasonably manageable ..

    I bet they're pleased to be home ... cheers - Hilary

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    Replies
    1. thanks, hilary....we accomplished our goal and enjoyed it, too! Can't ask for more than that!

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  27. I guess it is harder to deal with situations times three.but they did very well and you know your boys.lol
    It is nice they didn't miss their brothers wedding.

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    1. Oh, I'm so glad we took them. But that was never a question...we all wanted them there!

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  28. beautiful photos, thanks for sharing.

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    1. thanks, christine....you all are great and I just had to share! :)

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  29. You are such an amazing mom, with real insight into your boys and how they're doing. Awesome photos! What a true joy it must have been to see all those folks willing to dance with them. That tickles me to pieces. So thankful you survived. You deserve a t-shirt with that written on it. =)

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  30. that's wonderful that they handled everything so well! I love the onion ring tower too!

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  31. I am glad it went so well for you all. Was nice of people to include them. You look beautiful in the picture with you and Taylor dancing!

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  32. I really prayed it would not just go okay...but WELL for ALL of you. That everyone would enjoy such a special weekend! LOVE it that you could and also got to do some really fun things. Wonderful photos.

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  33. I like reading the "real" posts. Wondered how that came along for you. you handle it all so well, Betsy. WEll done! So glad all had a good time! What a memorable trip and wedding! :)

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